The tastiest of all conflicts

[foxfirefey]

kinglets knows how to win the war against Canada's snack foods:

Well I've got your number now, Canada. And I want you to know: I've figured out a way to beat you.

You wouldn't like it if I moved up there, would you, Canada? You wouldn't like it at all. Because if I moved up there I would get a Canadian job, and pay Canadian taxes, and buy hockey swag with your strangely colorful money.

And every day of my life I would visit stores filled with your delicious crack-laced junk food. And eventually, like constant exposure to iocaine, I would lose my vulnerability to it.

And then, Canada. THEN WHAT WOULD YOU DO.