smoochgator must think of Winona Rider a lot

[foxfirefey]

smoochgator must think of Winona Ryder a lot:

Whenever I’m in a public restroom, and one of the other ladies just rinses her hands under cold water for a second, or worse yet, doesn’t even pretend to be concerned with hygiene, I’m always reminded of Winona Ryder. Why, you may ask? Because my sister ran into her in the ladies’ room at the Orlando premiere of Murderball, and was scandalized that Winona did NOT wash her hands after exiting the bathroom stall. Because I always usually try to think the best about people, I came to Winona’s defense, saying that perhaps she had a small bottle of Purel in her purse and she used that because washing one’s hands and then touching the disease-infested door handle on the way out was an exercise in futility. Or perhaps she just went into the bathroom stall to adjust her pantyhose or do a line of coke? We’ll never know. All I know is my sister didn’t introduce herself to dear Winona because she didn’t want to shake her hand.

Context is number five in seven quick takes.

esther_asphodel has an a-llama-ingly goofy family

[foxfirefey]

Quote:

This is the sort of thing I have to deal with at family gatherings.

Warped Uncle: "You can't tell that it is the end times until you have been kissed by a South American camel."

Everyone else (with pained expressions): "Why?"

Warped Uncle: "Because it's the alpaca-lypse."