metaquotes | Two things that do not go well together

foxfirefey posting in

lamentables has discovered two things that have a TMI but amusing noncompatability:

I am a dedicated user of the Mooncup. I am also a dedicated user of fresh chillies.

These two things are not wholly compatible.

Flat | Top-Level Comments Only

From:

damned_colonial

Ow!

From:

hooloovoo

That took me a minute to get, but yeah: Ow.

From:

yvi

I, um, know the feeling. In a slightly different set-up, but yeah.

TMI: Boy likes to cook with chillies.

From:

foxfirefey

Iiii once had an awkward instance involving Tiger Blam.

From:

zorkian

TIGER BLAM

WHEN A LITTLE TIGER IS JUST NOT ENOUGH

From:

foxfirefey

From:

phoenixsong

KITTEN!

From:

yvi

AWWWWWWWWWWWWWW

From:

lea_hazel

You're a kitty! And you're sitting there! HI, KITTY!

From:

foxfirefey

From:

wanted_a_pony

Test was completely successful. Housetigerkitties wish to register a complaint about the offensive cackling noises which have Upset Their Carefully Considered Nap Schedule.

From:

wanted_a_pony

I wince/smiled at the OP.
Then I snickered at the "tiger blam" comment. THEN I hit your explanation of the comment, & the tigerkitty pic right after it.

My formerly-sleeping housetigerkitties wish to register a complaint: you have caused an Upset In Their Carefully Regulated Household. Naps have been interrupted by offensive cackling noises! If this recurs they will have to Take Official Notice....

From:

afuna

*ouch*

From:

thedivinegoat

Ow ow oww!

From:

noracharles

I feel offended and grossed out by your menstruation shaming. I would have understood a cut text of "cut for mention of bodily function" or "cut for mention of private parts in a non-sexual context", because there can be times and places where content like that is not appropriate to read.

I get the impression that you don't entirely agree with shaming females for our natural bodily functions, but that you're going along with it to, what, keep from getting flamed? As a signal that you know you're breaking a cultural taboo and you're oh so transgressive and naughty and cool?

Well don't. It's gross.

From:

foxfirefey

It's a tricky subject to navigate sometimes. What I was trying to do was to be specific enough to keep the people who wouldn't want to read it away (ie, people who don't properly appreciate nifty hygiene devices can stay out of my clubhouse), but I guess in a way that can also function as a shaming.

And I think I really like the phrase "alternative feminine hygeine" because when I was in high school, nobody even told me alternatives even existed. And then I found out all of these alternatives nobody ever really talked about! And I guess I do admit that I feel a bit of nervousness trying to navigate through it all. Because I really, really love my cup and am so grateful that it even exists, and I want to tell other people about how AWESOME AND AMAZING it is, but sometimes I have a hard time figuring out other people's TMI boundaries and I don't want deal with the repercussions of stepping over them.

From:

noracharles

I get that. I love alternative feminine hygiene products as well, and think it's important that we spread the word. I wish I had learned about the different options available when I first needed them, and I think we owe it to all people who are currently or are probably going to be menstruating to spread the word.

Now that I've calmed down, I can see that by posting about it on metaquotes, and by explicitly using the words "alternative feminine hygiene", you were doing your part to spread the word. I would have preferred not using a cut at all, but knowing about restrictions placed on what people can read at work or in public, I can understand it, and the cut texts I suggested would not have helped inform readers of the existence of other options.

I'm sorry I blew up at you.

From:

foxfirefey

Thanks--I was getting a little bit nervous there, because your second paragraph is definitely more what I was going for with my cut, not shaming. But, I did change the cut text right before I got this comment, just to make sure. And I definitely spread the word where I feel I can; I think I've gotten a couple of my women friends using cups since I found out about them, which I think is great. They're not for everyone, but if they are for you they make such a great difference that it's worth it to try.

Edited Date: 2009-11-04 09:45 am (UTC)

From:

noracharles

Thank you for being so great about this :-)
And thank you for helping to spread the word. I like your new cut text a lot, btw, it's funny, and I think people will click it and get informed.

From:

hillarygayle

*blink* I just want to jump in and tell you BOTH how awesome it is that I just read a conversation in which someone snapped, someone responded, and it ended cordially. I just don't see that very much on the internet. It made my day.

From:

azurelunatic

I read this as a "just nonspecific enough" summary, rather than a slur.

From:

noracharles

"Just nonspecific enough" to not offend. Because menstruation is offensive.

I don't think "alternative feminine hygiene" is a slur. I think the idea that menstruation is embarrassing and shameful, that buying menstruation products is a horrifying ordeal, that it's a great insult to ask a man who's going to the story anyway to pick up some for you, that you have to lie about using the products by hiding them away in closed cupboards, not having a pail in your bathroom, carrying your whole purse or jacket with you into a bathroom because you can't just take your product out of the purse/pocket and carry it in your hand, etc. etc. is offensive.

I don't think snot, earwax or skin oil are appropriate topics for dinner conversation either, but people don't freak out about ads for kleenex, q-tips and neutrogena. I guess it's not a shameful and tabooified bodily excretion when men are doing it.

If

lamentables had been changing their contact lens instead of their cup,

foxfirefey probably would not have felt the need to hide the text behind a cut that said "mention of ocular device". However, there are rules about the use of computers in certain places that could get people in trouble if they read anything about vaginas, so on reflection, I think

foxfirefey found a good compromise.

From:

jalendavi_lady

I considered the TMI to not be the Mooncup reference, but rather the implied OWWWIES.

From:

foxfirefey

Also, I labeled it TMI because the original post did!

From:

noracharles

Because the original cut text mentioned alternative feminine hygiene, I jumped to the conclusion that that was the reason for having a cut, and I was upset. Foxfirefey explained that they mentioned alternative feminine hygiene in the cut text exactly so it wouldn't be hidden by the cut. I have apologized for going off at them.